Cheer up, lonely hearts! There are plenty of other cat collectors and unsuccessful Tinder swipers looking for something to do the most lovey-dovey day of the year. Join forces to bask in bitterness together, instead of feeling like a third-wheel to the entire city’s romantic evening.
Definitive Smiths tribute band the Sons and Heirs will host their annual Feb. 14 misery bash at the Bell House in Gowanus. So if you’re feeling the pangs of existential despair as you drift towards the grave alone, as we all are, just come dance it out to some truly great tunes about isolation and numbness on the banks of Brooklyn’s nautical purgatory — and remember, in the end, none of it matters.
“Unloveable: A Smiths and Morrissey Valentines Day” at the Bell House [149 Seventh St. at Second Avenue in Gowanus, (718) 643–6510, www.thebe
The Gowanus venue Littlefield has you covered both before and during Valentine’s Day — first, you can dress in all black and dance by yourself to Depeche Mode at its Feb. 12 Anti-Valentine’s Party. And on Feb. 14, come back and have a laugh about your romantic failures at the Rejection Show, where comics will tell their best stories about breakups, while you enjoy live music and booze.
“It’s Friday, I’m (Not) in Love” on Feb. 12 at 10 pm, $8, and “The Rejection Show Valentine’s Day Heartbreak Haven” on Feb. 14 at 7 pm, $10–$12, at Littlefield [622 Degraw Street between Third and Fourth Avenues, www.littl
Come raise your lighter, pump your fist, and sing your heart out to wrenching power ballads from Guns ’N’ Roses, Bryan Adams, and Poison at Union Hall’s ’80s-themed “Love Bites” show on Feb. 13. Prepare to display your anguish in an air-guitar solo competition while sipping on cocktails like “More than Words.”
“Love Bites: The Power Ballads Sing-Along” at Union Hall [702 Union St. between Fifth and Sixth avenues, (718) 638–4400, www.union